Humbled By a Toilet
Not only my phone, but now my toilet is smarter than I am? I am humbled yet again. It happens a lot these days as I continue my path of elderhood. Wisdom seems to mean realizing just how much we don’t know… a list that seems to grow every day. I have accepted that my cell…
Quiet Eldering
Quiet, but no less powerful I have live most of my life thus far quietly. I learned that this style was the best way to feel safe in my childhood, given a very strict and authoritarian father whose anger was intense. Although he never lashed out physically, he was quick to anger. I don’t think that…
Self-Confidence
Always a challenge for me We have issues that we work on for our entire lives. One of my major issues has been self-confidence or lack there-of. I marvel at others around me who jump in confidently, even as beginners, and just believe that they will do ok. I have never been that way. I can…
I Don’t Feel That Old
My body begs to differ I am older than I feel on the inside. My body, however, is screaming my age at me regularly. I have aches and pains. My skin tears, breaks down, is more fragile. I have no idea where random bruises came from as they show up. My movements are slower; my flexibility…
Releasing a Crow
I got to release a crow back into the wild today I volunteer at several places these days, now that I am retired. I tell people that I volunteer with animals, since my career was as a social worker, so I feel like I “gave at the office” with people and it’s now time for me…
The Toxic Power of Shame
Shame can be a shroud that dampens your spirit and claims your life As an elder now, I am humbled yet again by the power of deep shame when I do something that I perceive as wrong, as against my principles, against who I want to be. I intend to try and be the best version…
Bruises On Our Souls
Not visible, but no less painful I recently took quite a fall, and one of the resulting bruises is a wonder to behold. It’s huge, and now with colorful shades of purple, green, and red. I have been hiding it, I notice with interest, as if it is a shame to have fallen, another indicator of…
The Gift of Attention
Paying attention can be a gift of love I have reached the chapter of elderhood in my life. It came quickly, surprised me (and still does), and comes with lessons. Lessons and answers Love is the answer, the songs say. Love makes the world go around. Love will conquer all. Love is greater than hate. All these…
Random Moments of Grace and Connection
You never know when a gift will present itself I made it to the gym the other day, a success in and of itself. ( I claim my successes where I can these days!) I was working out when I noticed this woman not far from me. She was working out steadily, strong and focused,…
Birthday Hangover
From feelings, not alcohol I made it through my birthday yesterday. And I am surprised at the hangover feeling today. I feel hung over from feelings, thoughts, inner reactions, unsettledness. Don’t get me wrong. I am so very grateful to still be here, still alive and on this earth and able to experience it all. It…
Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.
Follow My Blog
Get new content delivered directly to your inbox.
I'm Not Dead Yet! 