Buried Treasure

It has been deep inside of you all along.

I recently heard from a friend that she felt that she had “lost it” when responding to an emotional situation.

What an interesting way that many of us have learned to think about this part of ourselves. This emotional, tender, vulnerable part of ourselves. This part that we can be so careful to hide and to push down, in many situations. To carry on without deeply acknowledging what may be going on inside of us.

How sad and what a loss that this can be.

As someone who feels her way through much of life, I do see the value of containing the feelings enough to be able to name them, express them where and when we feel that they, and we, will be safe enough, really heard, really seen.

I can become flooded with emotions at times. I have learned to speak enough of the language of containing them in order to best survive, thrive, and protect myself when necessary. To pause and use thoughts to be better able to name these feelings so that I can express them as best as I can. 

This containment and control can be taken too far. 

 I wrote back to this dear friend. What I responded with was that I did not think that she had “lost it”. Rather, I continued, I felt like she had found it. Found and experienced that deep and sacred part of herself that responds from the heart. That reacts to and connects with the pain and the heart of others. That part that makes her unique and wonderful. That part of her that I treasure as such a gift in our friendship. 

That part of us has often been buried treasure. Buried, as treasures often are, by storms and the passage of time. Buried where they are not easily found. Buried deep and waiting. 

I learned to try and completely bury this treasure inside myself as well. Unsuccessfully, for the most part, thankfully. 

This treasure is what makes us human. What helps us connect on this very bittersweet, human journey that we are all on together.

How important it is to be able to share this part of us with others. To help us all feel a bit less alone for a moment in time. To look with our hearts rather than our brains. And then invite our brains along, but give them a rest as the sole master. To let our brains know that they can step back at times, that they can stop and allow other parts of us to take the lead for a while.

For me, thus far life has been best navigated by this entire team inside me, by all parts of me. By my brain, which helps me figure my way through. By my heart, which helps me feel the love, pain, connection and loss that is part of life. By my gut, which helps warn me with deep instinctual reactions when something, or someone, may not be safe for me at that time. 

Aging, with the experience and wisdom that it brings, has taught me to be able to recognize this precious treasure within me. I gratefully open it and allow it to fill me. I acknowledge it as one of the most beautiful parts of me and I honor it as a sacred gift. 

I am so grateful that this treasure did not get lost. That it waited patiently for me to come home to myself and find it, recognize it, and allow it to come to the surface.

This treasure has reminded me that my feelings are such tender gifts, to myself and to others. That my writing from my heart can perhaps, at times, be a guiding light to encourage others to find their own buried treasure. 

Are you ready to go on a treasure hunt?

 I’ll be right beside you.